The feelings of Deja vu

Do you guys also experience the feeling of deja vu~" a feeling of having already experienced the present situation"

Everything~ my furniture, boxes of my clothes, dishes and other stuff was loaded into my black toyota 4 runner and my  friend Niharika's Chevrolet truck. I was very tired, from past few hours as i was loading the stuff continuously into the vehicles. My other friends Harji, harpreet helped me with moving . The moving is the pain in the ass. I was very desperate to leave the place and grab some food and cold beverage on my way back home to Santa Rosa.     

Finally, it was time to say good bye to my home (my apartment). My apartment which is located at second floor of the old building of Acadian properties in North Davis.I went upstairs to lock my apartment and take the final pictures....i stood at the entrance door and quietly looked at the empty apartment. Three years n half years ago i came to live in this apartment. At that time, this apartment was occupied by my older brother. Leaving alone with my older brother was challenge because we are two different people with different schools of thoughts.   

 There were times when we had terrible fights and also the times..... when my bro used to make italian pasta for me~ since thats the only thing he knew how to make :). I used to sit on kitchen counter top and study while he used to cook for me.  The times when we used to argue on the current events or....have debate on stem cell research in which he was involved. The times when we criticized each other and the times when we watched superbowl (soccer) together and cursed at raider for losing..lol!!  The time when our mom, dad and all our relatives came to visit our apartment when my bro graduated with Honors in Molecular Biology.  The two years ago when he left me alone in  this apartment and went to medical school for his further studies.  My life in this apartment for two years had been great. It wasn't my just apartment#7.... only but my HOME AWAY FROM HOME.    

Standing on doorsteps... "huh....time to find another home" i uttered. Certainly, i had Deja vu...i have experience the exact same feelings before....6 years ago...while leaving my house in ludhiana, India, where i lived since my birth. I clearly remembered how much i cried when i was leaving my home in India....my house in india was not very big house......But the walls of those house speak the stories of my childhood and my adolescent.  Suddenly i felt quite low and emotional,  ...because i wasn't sure where i was gonna live from now on...will i be able to find another home for myself that was the question?  "Shelly" , niharika called. "Time to hit highway before it gets too busy"...and i step down the stairs to my car....and drove away....from my ex-home...in search of new home...!

~A Homesless Bird...

The Moments of departure!

In my first blog, I want to acknowledge the person from whom I learnt the idea of blogging i.e. my friend and former classmate Rishab Singla~ Thanks Rishab. I am feeling very sad today  and may be this is the reason i decided to write this journal. 

  

Today was last meeting with my coach Nick. It was his retiring ceremony at PHS. He has been my mentor for last 6 years and i guess he will always be one. Today standing on the Lacrosse field in 102 F all the memories from past 6 years came and stood in in front of me. Honestly speaking i was never interested in sports before coming to US.  Back at home (India) i went to DAV public school, and the sportsmanship was never encouraged. I am not complaining but just stating the fact. Ok getting back to the point.

 

  My first day at high school in America, where students have to take some kind of sports in order to get their high school diploma. I was not very happy being part of the sports so called "LACROSSE" I was like "what is this game",  I had never heard of this sport before.

 Being a pessimistic ass i went to my first orientation meeting. I clearly remember, among other 24  white tall girls,  i was the only one Asian girl.... Not only my skin color was different, but my dress code was totally different, instead of wearing mahroon shorts and matching jersey, I was wearing grey sports pajamas and white t-shirt, which I now find hilarious :) But it  was natural since I was new to school and also the game.

In few moments i heard the whistling sound and there was my coach. He was tall, handsome white guy....he is really charming and caring gentleman.. :) He took our roll and he was stuck when he had to call my name, he had hard time speaking my name. For his connivence, from than on he gave me a new name ~PARVY.   He said, today we our just going to do 20 laps and 20 sit ups and push ups and  call the day. After 20 laps and 10 push ups....i was out of breadth....Man it was hard and i was not at all happy. I wanted to quit.Keeping this in mind and thinking that i will go for any other sports, i was leaving the gym and when my coach nick said "welcome to the family, Parvy and i will see you next time"....his sweet and kind words made me changed my mind and did went back ...yay!!!

With every passing day, I was in love with Lacrosse. It wasn't just the sports for me, but my meditation,  a way of breezing out from the ups and downs of the life, .  I can't say that i was very fantastic player, since i was new, but yes! i did made my effort and i scored really well during the season games. From high school i got the sports scholarship for college and which further encouraged me to play  for SRJC. 

His Loud and clear words "You can do it......YOU can do it" .."They won't give it to  you..you have to snatch it.....snatch it....show me you can do it...prove me right."  echoed my mind even during my academic career... I continued playing lacrosse even after my graduation. 

Back to-today, at our meeting with my coach at very same place where i was introduced to lacrossey i.e. on the field of Piner high school, santa rosa. All the girls were waiting for him to come and there i heard whistle again....but everybody became quiet, which was very usual.  Coach Nick gave  good bye speech which made every eye moist. This man hasn't changed, full of life and humor. 

      I wanted time to stop so that i could live in those moments of season games when i was loser and winner at times....there were times when i used to get really tired and gave up...but he always stood as pillar and inspire me to fight, regardless of the consequences.  

Finally,  when coach came upto me and hugged  me, i could not stop crying..... I could see tears in his eyes as well. He has given 30 years of his life to this field.... He said "you  are amazing young lady, parvy, I am sure you will go far along and stay in touch honey!". My heart was sinking and i was out of words. 

Being human we all hate this moment when we have to say good bye to people whom we love, adore and respect.  

~Parvy